Saturday, April 5, 2014

The Fresh Prince of the Antarctic

Now this is a story all about,

How my coworkers all got flip-turned inside out.

And I’d like to take a minute,

as the star of the flick,

I’ll tell you how an alien crashed my party in the Antarctic.

In West Antarctica, bored and glazed.

A helicopter was where I spent most of my days.

Chessin’ up maxin’ puttin’ whiskey in my face

Until we had to shoot those Norwegians outside of the base.

We flew up to their crib saw something was amiss,

An alien was making trouble we just couldn’t dismiss.

The dogs got in one little fight and we all got scared.

We said, “That thing’s not natural, we’d all best beware!”

We had to be careful cause if it came near

It could copy our flesh

And look like us in the mirror.

If anything I could say that this thing was rare

But I thought, “Nah, let’s kill it!

…Yo what happened to Blair!?

We-pulled-up to find our rides in dismantled state,

So with nowhere to run, I yelled to my homies,

“Yo, let's blow this place into a crater!”

I looked at the ruins and felt a nip in the air.

I might freeze to death,

but (hopefully) that damn alien just couldn't compare.

Now I'll sit right here and remind y'all not to be too greedy.

So, sayin' a prayer, signin' off, this is pilot R.J. MacReady.