Monday, January 13, 2014

Book List 2013: Roundup (Part 2)

* = Reread
[GN] = Graphic Novel or Comic Anthology
[CB] = Children's Book
[AC] = Art collection

Watch out! A couple of books triggered my dirty sailor mouth and I couldn't help myself from unleashing a number of swears. So consider your virgin eyes warned.




39.

The Well of Lost Plots

by. Jasper Fforde

The 3rd book in the Thursday Next series.


As you might recall from the previous section, I was shanghaied into reading these.

Like I said before, they're all right. But their plots don't interest me at all. Unless someone else finds a way to thrust more of these books into my hands this will probably be the last Thursday Next book I ever read.






40.

NOS4A2

by. Joe Hill

Certain individuals are endowed with supernatural abilities that they can unlock by channeling a bit of themselves through a object familiar. Victoria McQueen, for instance, has the ability to find lost things. But when she accidentally makes herself known to a cruel child murderer—with an ability of his own—her life and the lives of those closest to her are endangered.


This book was a lot more Stephen Kingy than I'm used to from Joe Hill, so I didn't like it as much as his other novels. However, I did thoroughly enjoy it for what it was. I don't know about Scary, but it was definitely Exciting. It caught me and never let me go. I had a couple late night sessions where I really wanted to go to bed, but I just couldn't put it down.

The characters, the pacing, the ideas; all of them brilliant.






41.

Dawn of the Dead

by. George Romero & Susanna Sparrow

A novelization of the classic film.


I really don't understand why this exists. It's nowhere near as enjoyable as the movie.

Just go watch the movie.






[GN]   42.   [GN]

Crying in Front of Your Dog
and Other Stories

by. Phil McAndrew



A collection of short comics from Phil McAndrew.


A strange little collection. It seems quite large, but Phil McAndrew's style of comics uses a kind of flipbook style of paneling, where each page acts as a single panel. The first section of the book features a few longer stories and they make up for the vast majority of its mass. While half of these were pretty fun, the other half seemed kind of like a huge waste of space. The jokes he was telling could have been told much, MUCH more concisely.

Case in point: “The Secret Thoughts of Harold Lawrence Windcrampe.” It uses 45 pages to make the point that confident Bros have better luck with women than thoughtful dorks, because the bros will actually talk to women instead of hanging back and just thinking forever about doing so. And there wasn't even anything visually interesting happening. A fifth of the book for that. Ridiculous.

However, whatever qualms I have with the first section, they are no match for how much I enjoyed the second section. The second half of the book has his shorter pieces and they are hilarious. They made me go from “I'm not so sure about this book” to “Hahaha! This book is great!” in two stories and there were 16 more after that!

So yeah. There are a couple weak parts, but there are also some incredible strong parts as well. And there's much more great than weak here, which is the best you can hope for with collections, don't you think?






[GN] *  43.  * [GN]

Bokurano
vol. 1, 2, 7

by. Mohiro Kitoh

A group of children stumble across a strange man who invites them to play a game. What kind of game? One in which they have to pilot a gigantic robot and defeat a series of other robots. However, the children soon learn that the game is all too real and the fate of the world is now in their hands.


I actually read this series for the first time last year and I was so fascinated by it that I was going to make a special post all about it—which is why you won't see it listed—but I shamefully never got around to it. Thus I'll talk about it here, because this series is pretty much amazing and you should know about it. Especially since I've started trying to amass the whole series for my collection.

This series is so good, but in such a dark way. I'm sure you've heard of giant robot fighter stories before, but this one is different. It's bleak and insightful, depressing and heartfelt. The characters are flawed and human. It uses this truly bizarre premise as a way of dealing with some really deep ideas. What would you do if you knew you were going to die? How hard would you fight to save the lives of those you care about? What lengths would you go to and would the cost be worth it? How would true power change you?

I really don't want to give anything away, but trust me on this. If you like science fiction and dark stories, then you need to read this series. It has a higher death toll than I've ever seen in a story before, and it's all so powerful. It's the kind of story that really gets under your skin. The premise is so silly you get blindsided by how deep the story actually is and it all just serves to make everything all the more interesting.

I'd really love to go into the series in-depth, but I don't want to ruin any of the surprises for you. Just trust me. Read the first two volumes. If you find yourself hopelessly intrigued? Well, then you're welcome!






44.

Let's Explore Diabetes With Owls

by. David Sedaris

A collection of humorous essays.


Probably my second favorite Sedaris collection after Me Talk Pretty One Day? Actually, it's been a while before I've reread them all, so probably shouldn't say that, but it might be? And considering how much I love David Sedaris that's saying something.






45.

The Summer is Ended and We Are Not Yet Saved

by. Joey Comeau

One summer a young boy goes to Bible Camp so that his mom can take a high profile job out of town for a few weeks. But something isn't right about this camp. For one thing there's a lot more murders than you'd expect.


This is actually a retelling of Comeau's earlier story Biblecamp Bloodbath. He went back retooled it and made it into a longer story. I was hoping to go back and reread it so I could compare them, but it's not online anymore and I can't find a copy to buy. Alas!

---------------
P.S.
If anyone ever needs a gift for me consider trying to track me down a copy of Joey Comeau's original Biblecamp Bloodbath.
---------------

The sad thing is I love both versions for different reasons. I love that this one went deeper into the story and the characters. I also feel like it did a better job of establishing itself as a proper story, as something more than just a set-up to horror. However, the original version has a truly wonderful ending. Seriously. It creates one of the best ending notes I've ever seen. While this ending note is still in The Summer is Ended, they play it much earlier and it loses so much of its power because of that.

So I'm conflicted. But a lot of you probably have no idea what I'm talking about and wish I'd just talk about the book on its own. Okay, okay.

If you like horror films then I'm sure you'll like this one. Comeau is a connoisseur of horror films and you can really tell. He brings his usual A Softer World-yin yang outlook to the table here, wherein everything is shades of grey. Where there's darkness in the light and light in the darkness. Where there's something fun about violence and mayhem. And there's something heartbreaking that lurks in love.






[CB]   46.   [CB]

The Barefoot Book of Animal Tales From Around the World

 by. Naomi Adler
illustrated by. Amanda Hall

A collection of animal fables from around the world. I mean, you did read the title right?


What can I say? I'm a sucker for fables and I found this at the public library's used book store for 50c! And it turned out to be really fun! I think there was only one story I was a little meh about, but the rest were great. Plus I had never heard of most of them before, which makes them even better!

Anyways, the moral here is that this was a great purchase on my part.






[GN]   47.   [GN]

Copper

by. Kazu Kibuishi

A collection of lushly colored comic strips about the adventures of a boy and his dog.


I've been a big fan of this comic from way back when it was updating online. So when I happened across a Copper book at my local comic book store, you'd better believe I grabbed it immediately.

I'd say Copper is Kazu Kibuishi's best work. It's imaginative and hopeful and visually striking. I encourage you to check that link out and see what you think.






[GN] *  48.  * [GN]

BONE

by. Jeff Smith

A group of brothers get lost in the desert after being run out of their hometown. After stumbling upon a valley they quickly find themselves in the middle of an ancient war: The lord of the locusts vs. the dragons.


BONE is my favorite graphic novel. Period.

It is impossibly good. Jeff Smith's artwork is gorgeous. The story is both huge and epic, while also cute and humorous. The characters are endearing. I just love it so much.

If I could only have one book to read for the rest of my life, this would be my choice.






49.

The Haunting of Hill House

by. Shirley Jackson

A group of people are brought to a supposedly haunted house by a scientist who's seeking solid evidence of a real haunting. However, none of them were prepared for what they would actually find.


 I just want to mention upfront that this isn't a haunted house novel, this is THE haunted house novel. In fact it is often regarded as one of the best horror novels of our day.

Because of Joey Comeau's recommendations of her, I've started really getting into Shirley Jackson's work and I'm so glad I did. She has a writing style that is brilliant, but oh so hard to describe.

For instance, this book isn't really scary so much as it is unsettling. It makes you uncomfortable. The house in the story is described as being built at slightly unusual and inconsistent angles so it would make its occupants uncomfortable without them knowing why. The more I read the more I felt like that's a perfect metaphor for how this story makes its readers feel.

There is just something about it that's creepy. Even when nothing explicit is happening it still gets to you. It reminded my of The House of Leaves in the way that it could impart the mood of a setting/character into you through its writing.






[AC]   50.   [AC]

The Nu Project:
Beauty in Every Body, Vol. 1
 photography by. Matt Blum 

“The Nu Project is a series of honest nudes of women from all over the world. The project began in 2005 and has stayed true to the original vision: no professional models, minimal makeup and no glamour. The focus of the project has been and continues to be the subjects and their personalities, spaces, insecurities and quirks.”



If I had a teenage daughter I would slip this into her bookshelf. I know, I know, putting a book of nude photography in your child's hands? What kind of a person would do that? Perverts, right? But think about it. It's a collection of beautiful photographs of beautiful women. It would show her that Beauty isn't what we see in the media, it's a state of mind. Here are these women who don't look like models, but they don't care. And why should they? Why should anyone? They're happy, comfortable in their bodies, and they're each beautiful in their own personal way. What a great message to get across, don't you think?

The concept of Beauty we receive from the media is a dangerous one that we are all forced to internalize in some way of another. The wonderful thing about this book is that it's like an antidote of sorts. It makes you doubt what everyone is selling, by giving you another point of reference. A truer point of reference.

After getting it earlier in the year I've already pulled it down off my bookshelf more than once. It works great for whenever I feel the need to realign my sense of normal. Like zeroing out a scale.

It's easy to fall into the trap of marketed beauty, because that's often all we see, but that's not how the world really is. That's not what Beauty really is. And thank God for that, because there's so much more beauty in the world than people would have you believe. And it's nice that there's a book like this to remind us of that.






51.

Poor Yorick

by. Ryan North
Illustrations by. Tyson Hesse

A short choose-your-own-adventure story of the life (and often death) of Hamlet's boyhood jester.


This was a little extra book that I got from backing Ryan North's To Be or Not to Be project on Kickstarter. It's a little choose-your-own-adventure book about the character of Yorick from Hamlet. You might recall him [or at least his skull] from the classic image of Hamlet holding up a skull—which belonged to his old jester— and saying, “Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him well.”

It's a short little book, as you can expect considering Yorick's outcome in Hamlet, but it's a lot of fun. Tyson Hesse did the illustrations for it and they just make the whole thing even better.






[GN]   52.   [GN]

Hilda and the Midnight Giant

by. Luke Pearson

Hilda and her mother are being evicted from their home by the little elves that live nearby. Hilda sets out to find out why and to try and save her home.


I went to a local book/comic fair thing this year and overall it was...really dumb. I swear there is this Independent-Selfpublished- Comic aesthetic out there, and the vast majority of the time it all looks the same: shitty. They've got dirty/sloppy linework and an overinflated sense of worth. I was hoping to find some great comics I had never heard of before, but nothing even came close.

But I'm getting off topic, the one bright light of the trip was that there was an independent bookseller who had a booth there and they had a bunch of awesome stuff that suited my fancy. And this was one of them!

And what a great find it was! It is such a cute story and the art matches everything perfectly. I'm not even sure how to describe it. It's like if a Japanese myth was told with American silliness in a European styled comic structure? I dunno. Whatever it is, it's fun and imaginative and just plain well told. I'm a big fan and I highly recommend it.






[CB]   53.   [CB]

Bear Despair

by. Gaetan Doremus

The story of a bear whose teddy bear gets stolen. Now the bear is determined to get it back and will gobble up anyone who gets in its way.


A fun little book, but what really intrigued me about it is that it has no words what-so-ever. The story is told completely in pictures. It really is a joy when people can pull that off, because it creates a story that anyone can enjoy. What a fun kids book.






54.

The Bento Bestiary

by. Ben Newman & Scott James Donaldson

A bestiary of 14 Japanese yōkai.


I've got a serious soft spot for books about monsters and spirits and whatnot, so you'd better believe I was all over this colorful little collection of Japanese monsters. The writing is quite fun and the pictures are a delight. I absolutely love the art style in this thing. A very nice addition to my collection of monster books, if I do say so myself.






55.

To Be or Not To Be

by. William Shakespeare & Ryan North

A choose-your-own-adventure version of Shakespeare's classic tale of Hamlet; featuring illustrations by some of webcomic's finest.


Okay, technically I didn't read ALL of it, because I think that's gonna take a long time. But I did play through multiple storylines as all the characters, so you know what? Just let me have this one, okay?

Anyways, it is just as wonderful as I hoped it would be when I first heard about the Kickstarter for the project. And considering it was written by Ryan North (the man behind Dinosaur Comics and B to the F) it comes as no surprise that the writing is both wonderful and hilarious.

I mean, they had me at “Ryan North is making a Choose-Your-Own-Adventure version of Hamlet,” but then to add in all the artwork? That just brings this whole book into orbit. Each storyline ending is illustrated and they've got so many amazing artists and it just adds this extra punch of wonderful to each ending. Ugh! So good. I am in love with this book.

I'm currently seeing if I can donate a copy to my college library, because what an amazing thing that would be to stumble across in your college library! *fingers crossed*






56.

The Verse by the Side of the Road:
The Story of the Bruma-Shave Signs and Jingles

by. Frank Rowsome Jr.

A history of Burma-Shave and a collection of every one of their jingles.


Burma-Shave is one of those things I always make references to and no one ever gets what I'm talking about. I guess that's because the first sign appeared in Minneapolis and I heard about here at the Minnesota History Center, but still! It was a national phenomena for decades!

For those of you who don't know, back in the 20s-50s Burma-Shave billboards were everywhere. But these weren't the billboards that we're used to today. These were much smaller signs stuck in the side of the road and they'd have a little jingle broken up over multiple signs. So you'd see the first bit, then you'd drive a little further and see the next one, and on.


“TO GET
.
.
.
.
AWAY FROM
.
.
.
.
HAIRY APES
.
.
.
.
LADIES JUMP
.
.
.
.
FROM FIRE ESCAPES
.
.
.
.
BURMA-SHAVE.”


Isn't that awesome? They had these things all over the place and people would be reading them out loud in the car. I just love the idea of this being a thing. I mainly picked up the book because it has a collection of all the jingles, but the history of the company is actually pretty interesting. It's a pretty short read and the jingles are kind of hilarious and I would highly recommend you read it and learn about Burma-Shave.



“IF YOU
.
.
.
.
DON'T KNOW
.
.
.
.
WHOSE SIGNS
.
.
.
.
THESE ARE
.
.
.
.
YOU CAN'T HAVE
.
.
.
.
DRIVEN VERY FAR.
.
.
.
.
BURMA-SHAVE.”






57.

Hyrule Historia

by. Shigeru Miyamoto, Eiji Aonuma, & Akira Himekawa
edited by. Patrick Thorpe

An anniversary book for the Legend of Zelda series. Detailing the history of the series and all the wonderful details as to how the games are made.


A sexy hardbound book all about The Legend of Zelda series? Oh, you'd better believe I was all over that. It's pretty fun. They go over they're process for creating a game, by using Skyward Sword as an example. They've got a timeline showing how all the games are connected. They talk a little about the history of the series. But the piece de resistance is the concept art. They have tons of concept art from every game in the series! Ugh! So cool. For a big Zelda fan like me this thing is so much fun.






58.

A History of the World in 6 Glasses

by. Tom Standage

A book that looks at the history of the world through the lens of its most popular beverages (Beer, Wine, Tea, Spirits, Coffee, Pop) and their respective eras.


It's definitely an interesting book, but it lacked the cohesive vision it needed to make it something more. The history of the beverages was interesting and so was the history of their effects, but there's really no spine to the narrative they're telling, nothing to connect everything together. So it just ends up being “Here are some interesting facts about these beverages” as opposed to a book about the history of the world through its beverages.

Does that make sense?






59.

Love, Dishonor, Marry, Cherish, Perish

by. David Rakoff

A narrative done through rhyming verse.


I dunno. Overall I was underwhelmed by this one. However, I did enjoy parts of it and it was really interesting to see someone attempt to tell a story through rhyme like that. So while I'm glad I read it, the story it was telling just didn't interest me.

R.I.P. David Rakoff.






60.

Party of One:
A Loners' Manifesto

by. Anneli Rufus

A book defending and explaining the loners of our world.


Lots of interesting ideas and fabulous explanations, but overall there was something about this book that just bothered me.

I'm a loner so I could relate a lot to what she was saying.

“IMAGINE YOU'RE A loner whose ideal home would be a cottage on the beach, miles from the nearest neighbor. And your ideal day would be one in which you slept from noon to dinnertime, worked half the night, then split the rest between raising pigeons and walking—alone, of course—on the beach.”

I mean, wow. I can definitely relate to that one.


“Shared time, while not entirely wasted if the sharer is a true friend, must be parceled out with care... And time shared, even with true friends, often requires loners to put in EXTRA time alone, overtime, to recharge. It is a matter of energy: As a rule, loners have less for the social machinery, the talk and sympathy. Our fuel runs out. This is what nonloners don't understand about us...”

EXACTLY! This book truly understands us loners and does a great job explaining how we work.

The problem was that what started out as an interesting look at how loners work and are perceived eventually degrades into self-aggrandizing rants and unfettered metaphors. She would often portray the traits of loners as if they were superior. I think that's not only untrue, but also a little offensive. We all have friends who are loners and those who aren't, but to say that one side is intrinsically better is ridiculous. To be fair I don't feel that was the author's intent, I think she was trying to compensate for the general undervaluing of such traits, but that's just not how it came off to me.






[AC]   61.   [AC]

The Great Showdowns:
The Return

by. Scott Campbell

The second collection of Campbell's Great Showdowns collection.


If you love movies then you've gotta love Scott Campbell's Great Showdown pieces. They are just too much fun. If I had a coffee table you'd better believe these would be on there. It's just a blast to look through them and remember the movies you've seen and guess at the ones you haven't. And if you look at them with friends it's even more fun! Then it sparks discussions and jokes and is a catalyst for good times.

Plus while they're already fun in their online form, they are all the better as book collections. I've got nothing but love for Great Showdowns.






*   62.   *

I, Jedi

by. Michael A. Stackpole

After his wife is kidnapped, an interpol agent is forced to accept his long lost jedi heritage in order to gain the skills he needs to find and rescue her.


Yes, yes, in my youth I was the kind of kid that you could find reading Star Wars books. I've since gotten rid of most of them, but this one was one of my favorites. It's been years and years since I last read it so I figured I'd reread it.

Overall, I certainly wouldn't recommend it to anyone for its literary merit, but I still enjoyed it. It's got jedi fun and x-wing battles and all that great stuff. And as a light read it's great fun.






63.

My Planet:
Finding Humor in the Oddest Places

by. Mary Roach

A collection of Mary Roach's short essays for The Reader's Digest.


I saw that this was a collection of Mary Roach's short essays and I was sold. Yes, please. I expected it to be Roach's equivalent to Bill Bryson's I'm a Stranger Here Myself. But I was wrong.

I probably should have taken the time to notice that these short essays were for The Reader's Digest. If I was a middle-aged married woman I think I would enjoy this book greatly, but alas, I am not. Thus this really wasn't my kind of thing. However, I passed it on to my mom and she seems to have thoroughly enjoyed it. So there you go.






[GN]   64.   [GN]

Sailor Twain
- or -
The Mermaid in the Hudson

by. Mark Siegel

The story of a riverboat captain who rescues a mermaid and becomes bewitched. Now he must get to the bottom of the mermaid's curse if he is to ever be free of it.


Picked this one up on a whim from the library and was pleased to find that it was actually a lot of fun. It proved to be a really interesting twist on mermaids and I especially love how everything takes place on a river.






65.

A Pound of Steam

by. Dessa

A collection of poems from the rapper Dessa.


I lovelovelove Dessa's lyrics and her book of short stories Spiral Bound was phenomenal, so I was pretty darn excited for her to release this book of poetry. But, personally, it fell flat for me. Her poems lacked the snappy punch of her lyrics, and the great narrative structure of her short stories. But poetry is a very subjective medium, so I wouldn't give too much weight to my opinion.






*   66.   *

Gil's All Fright Diner

by. A. Lee Martinez

When a late night diner finds itself overrun with zombies it's up to an overweight werewolf and a balding vampire to save the day.


This is the first A. Lee Martinez book I ever read and it remains my favorite. Seriously, if you like stories about monsters and you're looking for a fun light read, you can't go wrong with this one. The characters are great and the whole thing is just a blast. It's got spirits trapped in magic 8 balls, wannabe cults, ghost dogs, and even zombie cows!






*   67.   *

Monster

by. A. Lee Martinez

When fantastical creatures keep inserting themselves into her life, a woman is thrust into the veiled world of magic & monsters and it's up to a hapless crypto-zoological animal catcher to keep her safe.


Another one of my favorite of Martinez' books. It's a light read, but tons of fun. I always have a blast reading it. It creates so many interesting visuals and new spins on classic ideas.






[GN]   68.   [GN]

Avatar:
The Search

written by. Gene Luen Yang, Michael Dante Di Martino, & Bryan Konietzko
art by. Gurihiro

The continuing story of the events after Avatar: The Last Airbender. This adventure finally explains what happened to Zuko's mother.


I think I've said this before, but I'm thoroughly enjoying these Avatar comics. They are just so well done. Admittedly the last volume in this storyline was a little too magical and happily-ever-after for my tastes, but I found the majority of it to be very well done and add a lot of depth to Zuko's history. Plus I'm a sucker for anytime spirits come into play.






69.

Zealot:
The Life and Times of Jesus of Nazareth

by. Reza Aslan

A look at the historical Jesus—the man—and establishing a context for the times in which he lived.


By far one of the most interesting non-fiction books I read this year. This book is fascinating and that's an understatement. I never would have stopped going to church if the people there had dealt with Christianity with half the insight, knowledge, and passion that Reza Aslan brings to the table. Especially since one of my major problems with modern Christianity is the idea of Jesus being God and not a man with flaws. A real person is so much more compelling than an ideal one.

If you're not sure, I would recommend watching this interview with Reza Aslan from The Daily Show where they talk about the book.


“...the one thing any comprehensive study of the historical Jesus should hopefully reveal is that Jesus of Nazareth—Jesus the man— is every bit as compelling, charismatic, and praiseworthy as Jesus the Christ. He is, in short, someone worth believing in.”






70.

Superman on the Couch:
What Superheroes Really Tell Us About Ourselves and Our Society

by. Danny Fingeroth

[The subtitle kind of says it all.]



Overall I’d say the questions this book asks are much more interesting than the answers it provides. This probably has a lot to do with the fact that it’s based almost entirely around the author’s personal thoughts and a handful of 2nd hand sources. As an academic/in-depth look at the subject of Superheroes as a lens for society, the book falls flat on its face. Anyone can propose interesting questions and theories about a genre, but if you don’t have evidence to back up your claims, then what’s the point?

It’s Fingeroth’s personal views from his years of experience working in comics, however, that save this book and kept me from tossing it aside. For example, his chapter on teenage superheroes (Chapter 8 “Changing Voices: From Robin to Spider-Man”) is particularly fascinating due to his close relationship with the Spider-Man series during his career in comics. It's made me look at Spider-Man in an entirely new light.

“It took Spider-Man to break the mold of the teen hero, in ways both subtle and obvious. The mythos of the character has become so much a part of pop culture that it's easy to forget just how different he was. So many characters have built upon or outright swiped from Spider-Man, that his shifting of the paradigm of what defines a superhero—teenage or otherwise—is taken for granted...”

In the end I think that if he had tailored the book more to his strengths, made it more personal and less attempted-academic, it would have been greatly improved. He has so many great questions and ideas; if he written the book in the form of him going around to other professionals in the field and asking them for their opinions on the topics and questions he had come up with? As well as bouncing some of his own theories off of them? That would have been AMAZING! I would have loved to read a book like that.

As the books stands, it’s just alright, but I’m glad I read it. If nothing else it’s given me a lot of interesting questions to think about…not to mention the brilliance of Chapter 8.






71.

The Ocean at the End of the Lane

by. Neil Gaiman

A man sits at the pond that had been an ocean when he was a young boy and remembers the time when a strange girl at the end of the lane helped him fight an ancient evil.


I wasn't sure what to expect going into this book, but it turned out to be the best new book I read this year. Holy crap is it ever good. Neil Gaiman is the master of the modern fairy tale.

I don't even know what to say about it. It has left me speechless. The next time I'm at a book store I'm buying myself a copy, because it is just so many kinds of brilliant. Seriously, do yourself a favor and go read it.






*   72.   *

In the Company of Ogres

by. A. Lee Martinez

The leaders of Ogre Company seem to have an unfortunate affliction for dying.  So  the higher-ups decide this will be a perfect time to give a promotion to their resident hapless immortal, Never Dead Ned. But when Ned takes charge he begins to learn that there are worse things than dying. Much worse.


I reread this one because I was considering to drop it from my collection. I have now decided that that is a good idea. It's not a bad story, in fact it's a pretty fun light read. But there's just not enough substance there.

I also don't like how all the ladies are falling for Ned for no reason.






73.

Trespass:
A History of Uncommissioned Urban Art


by. Carlo McCormick, Marc Shiller, & Sara Schiller

A collection of interesting photos of street art and also some rather unfortunate bits of text.


The pictures were great, but the writing was often rather art-critic pretentious. In spite of its title, the book is definitely not a “History” of anything; it's more of a coffee table street art book / collection of philosophical musings on graffiti than anything else. It's not bad for what it is, but it's definitely a letdown if you're expecting “A History of Uncommissioned Urban Art.”






74.

Parasite

by. Mira Grant

In the future, genetically modified tapeworms will save us from disease. However, there's just one unfortunate side effect...


I lovelovelove Mira Grant's Newsflesh series so I was incredibly excited to see her new series make its debut. But I think I got my hopes a little too high.

I think my biggest problem was that the story seems to think it's being clever when it's actually being SUPER obvious. I mean, when the synopsis on the back of the book says the worms want their own lives, and you have a character who had an accident and now can't remember anything of her past life, and considers herself a completely different person, and has dreams of being in a dark aquatic environment with the constant sound of a heartbeat!? I mean, it's kind of obvious what she's building up to. So its “reveal” at the end isn't a surprise. It's just drawn out and silly.

Plus, the main character is kind of the worst. She's horribly annoying. She's super teenage angsty and is pissy at her family for them having trouble dealing with the fact that their daughter nearly died and suddenly has a completely different personality. I mean, how dare they, right? I mean, even if you are a different person, that means their daughter is DEAD! And now this new person is walking around in her skin. Show some freakin' compassion, you ass.

Also I think we're supposed to be on her side when her family treats her like a child even though she's an adult? Buuuut, she did quite possibly have a seizure while driving, nearly died, and is currently showing multiple signs of significant brain damage. So, unless she wants to be confined to a hospital ward, maybe she should just deal with it.

OH! And she has an insane phobia of cars and freaks the fuck out at anyone who isn't paying 100% attention while driving. Frankly I can't understand why anyone would put up with her. “Meeeeh, pay attention to the road! If you don't I'm gonna get out and walk the 30 miles to get there by myself! Meeenuuhh! MEEENNGGHHFHDH!” Well, fine! Ugh! Get the fuck out and walk. I was doing you a favor. God. Have fun being an asshole to side of the road. I'll see you at home in 10 hours.

So aside from those not-so-minor problems, the heart of the story was fun and interesting. It just felt like this book was just here to set everything up. I think the sequel will be significantly better. A lot of interesting stuff was set-up at the end and I'd like to see where it goes. However, I have a feeling that the main character is going to prevent me from ever loving this series.






75.

Ghastly Beyond Belief

edited by. Neil Gaiman & Kim Newman

A collection of humorous excerpts from the worst (and occasionally the best) Science Fiction novels have to offer.


I've been wanting to read this book for years, but I've never been able to find a copy. I finally broke down and ordered it through interlibrary loan. I don't know about you, but this is right up my alley. And I was pleased to find that they didn't just collecting hilarious quotes from the text of the books, but they also got them from movie posters, book jackets, and all kinds of other wonderful sources. Really, I'm shocked this book is out of print. If you're a fan of Sci-Fi and/or MST3K then I think you'll have a lot of fun with this book.

[P.S. If you ever see this at a used book store, you should probably buy it and give it to me.]



“She held Hilda to her and let her have a good cry, and this was a wonderful relief after all the pent up feelings of those last few days of prison and cruel treatment by the octopoids.”

-Tom Wade, The World of Theda




“'What a beautiful night,' Pat remarked as they passed alongside the barbed-wire fence which enclosed War Department property. 'If only we didn't have to worry about giant crabs!'”

-Guy N. Smith, Night of the Crabs



“The first was a woman of about forty-five and she'd been attractive until someone had hewn her almost in half.”
 
-Lionel & Patricia Fanthrope, The Black Lion



“Some doddering scientists sneer at the idea of travel between stars. The nearest star, they say, is 25 trillion miles away. They forget that monorail trains are capable of astonishing speeds (over 200 m.p.h.!). Doubtless, despite the skeptics, we’ll have regular train service to Alpha Centauri and other stars, by the end of the century.”

-John Sladek, Space Shoes of the Gods







[GN]   76.   [GN]

The Complete Essex County

by. Jeff Lemire

A collection of three interconnected stories surrounding the people of a small county in Canada.


I've read the first two stories in the collection before, but let me tell you, they are so much better when they're are collected together and joined with the third story. This whole series is just so well done. This is one of those comics that I would show to someone who thought comics were just for kids, just stupid stories about superheros.

This arc Jeff Lemire has created here is just so powerful and moving. It moves between youth and old age, despair and hope. It's just beautifully done all around. I can't recommend this one enough.






77.

Unnatural Creatures

edited by. Neil Gaiman

A collection of short stories about unusual creatures.


After The Ocean at the End of the Lane I felt compelled to give some other Neil Gaiman books a try. This one's pretty fun. Like any collection some stories are definitely better than others. I love monster stories and I enjoyed reading it, but I'm glad I only checked it out from the library.






[GN]   78.   [GN]

Dial H
Vol. 1: Into You

written by. China Mieville

art by. Mateus Santolouco, David Lapham, & Riccardo Burchielli

An out of work schlub accidentally discovers that by dialing 4376 into a certain payphone he'll be temporarily transformed into a random superhero.


I was really interested in this one because I'm a big China Mieville fan and the premise sounded delightfully bizarre. And while it does have its moments, I was disappointed to find out that overall there's nothing of substance here.

Also, for the love of God, DC. Would it kill you to stick with one artist? I realize it might slow down your releases, but who gives a shit? Your stories look like they were drawn by someone who has to dial 278478 into a payphone every issue to turn into a random artist.








[GN]  79.   [GN]

Animal Man
Vol. 3: Rotworld: The Red Kingdom

written by. Jeff Lemire, Scott Snyder
art by. Steve Pugh, Marco Rudy, Andrew Belanger, et al.


A once brilliant series decides to turn away from their brilliant horror concept and fully embrace subpar superhero idiocy.


Oh, this series has fallen so far from where it started. I don't blame the authors as much as I blame the genre. The Achilles' heel of the DC and Marvel universes is that they want all their stories to be a part of the same world so they can have crossovers and shit. But because of that no one story can really go very big because it would influence the others too much.

I think if this series had been retooled as its own separate entity it would have been Brilliant. But in its current form it is a pale shadow of what it could have been. I mean, this whole volume is essentially telling some huge crossover post apocalyptic scenario and then SPOILER ALERT/: they go back in time and undo everything. So there was no point to it what so ever. /End of Alert

Not to mention that, no surprise, DC once again insisted on using a clown car full of artists. Just pick one! God! Is that so hard? Is it so wrong to want a story to have the same look throughout? Am I the crazy one here?

UGH! Whatever. Truth be told, I still enjoyed this volume, but for none of the same reasons I loved the earlier stuff. The beginning stuff was dark and epic and frightening. This one...is none of of those things. But it's stupid and doofy and manages to be so bad its amusing.

So yeah. I think I'm gonna stop reading this series now.








[GN]   80.   [GN]

Buzz!

by. Ananth Panagariya
art by. Tessa Stone

An awkward youth named Webster has just started high school and already he's fallen in with the wrong crowd: a pair of could-bes of the dark and dangerous world of underground spelling bees. And what's more he's a natural! But being a part of this world will mean defying his family.


This one had me at the premise. Not to mention the creators. You might be familiar with Ananth Panagariya as the writer of AppleGeeks (now defunct) or his current work on Johnny Wander. Tessa Stone was the creator of the brilliant Hanna is Not a Girl's Name, before she stopped and neglected to tell anyone to stop expecting new strips! But I'm not bitter. (Yes, I am.)

Anyways, this one is just as much fun as it sounds. The art and the writing really combine to create something really enjoyable. Plus I love the look of this thing. It's all done in black and white...and Yellow! I know it sounds a little weird, but trust me, they make it work.

Anyways, I seriously hope this duo either makes a sequel or just does some more projects together in the future, because I love what they've created here.






81.

Tales and Stories by Hans Christian Anderson

by. Hans Christian Anderson
translated by. Patricia L. Conroy & Sven H. Rossel


A collection of fairy tales from the infamous Hans Christian Anderson.



To my discredit I've really never read much of Hans Christian Anderson, but after Frozen came out I figured I should get on that.

First of all, if you ever come across anyone bashing Frozen for not being true to the original “The Snow Queen,” feel free to tell them they're being crazy. The original story is dumb. Not only is it dumb, but it's also all over the map, terribly forced, has an idiotic ending, and is kind of a big middle finger to logic? I guess a nice way to put it is that it's about the heart triumphing over the brain, or whatever, but science/reason bashing is a dangerous train to jump on.

Second of all, Anderson's stories are fucked up. And not fucked up in the wonderfully dark and twisted way of a Grimm Tale, but just fucked up. Case in point: “The Tinderbox.” That is the most superbly fucked up story I have ever heard. It's about a guy being a downright TERRIBLE person—who murders and steals and sexually harasses people—and is rewarded for it. Fuck that shit. I'm not about to read that to a kid.

Third of all, it was a slog to get through this thing. There are some interesting ideas in a few of the stories, but the stories themselves are so dumb. I don't really care what anyone else says, but I say kudos to Disney, because they vastly improved on “The Little Mermaid” and “The Snow Queen.”

Fourth of all, I'm told his work doesn't translate well, and I hope that's true. I really do, because it's kind of super shitty in English.






[GN]   82.   [GN]

A Softer World, Vol. 4: 
Let's Do Something Wrong

by. Emily Horne & Joey Comeau


The fourth collection of the greatest webcomic ever made: A Softer World.



Best. Webcomic. Ever.

Now in book form, which makes it even better! A Softer World is one of my favorite things in any medium.






83.

The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe

by. C.S. Lewis


 3 nice kids and their asshole brother travel through a wardrobe to a magical world and stick their noses into local politics.



First off, can I just mention how short this book is? I mean holy crap, it's tiny! You can read this in one sitting. I was expecting it to be much bigger. But hey, I guess that's possibly when you just forgo any real character or plot development. Haha! Zing!

I honestly can't remember if I've read this before. I want to say that I have, but maybe I'm just thinking of one of the movie versions I've seen? I can't say for sure.

Anyways, this book is super dull and that makes it a double threat because it's also really dumb. Yep, this book has a big ol' pair of the Double D's.

Reading this book was kind of like the literary equivalent of watching a ridiculous movie. You know, the kind where you're always shouting at the screen?

I was yelling at this thing left and right. For instance, Why would you let children rule you?! Children are stupid, you dumb lion. Even worse, why would you let a child be the general to your army? That little shit has ZERO experience with this. Maybe, just maybe, you should let one of your generals let the army? Just a thought. Also character development. Something to think about including in your next book.

ALSO, what kind of person just straight up forgets their own fucking childhood? These motherfuckers spend like 40 years in this crazy world and in that time they COMPLETELY forget their childhood and are all like “Forsooth, what be'ist thone metal pole? The top of it be'ith aglow! As if by spirit fire!” It's a fucking streetlight, dumbass! Jesus Christ, you were like 15 when you got here!

Ugh! This book, you guys. This book is ridonkulous.






84.

In the Land of Invented Languages:
Adventures in Linguistic Creativity, Madness, and Genius

by. Arika Okrent

A look at the Who, Whats, and Whys of invented languages.


I grabbed this from the library on a whim, but I was very much pleased to find out that it is fascinating. It dives into not only the history of these invented languages, but also why they were created. Through these invented languages we can really learn more about what works and doesn't work about our own language.

Really, this book impressed me. I was just expecting a fun little read that I might pick up a couple of interesting tidbits from, but it turned out to be an extremely well written book that made me do a considerable amount of pondering...plus it was full of interesting tidbits. If you have an interest in language, or are even intrigued by the idea of language, then I give this book my full recommendation.






[CB]   85.   [CB]

How Do Dinosaurs Say I'm Mad?

by. Jane Yolen
illustrated by. Mark Teague

Dinosaurs are used to show us how NOT to act when we're mad.


I got this one for my nephew for Christmas. He loves dinosaurs...and also gets mad and throws a fit sometimes, so it works!

The artwork is my favorite part. I love how he draws dinosaurs, and I also love that the humans shown are of different ethnicities. Overall it's a fun little book. I would have liked if it talked a little more about what to do with your anger, but I did like how it showed that getting mad and acting out isn't okay and that there are better ways to deal with your anger.






[CB]   86.   [CB]

Last Laughs:
Animal Epitaphs

by. J. Patrick Lewis & Jane Yolen
illustrated by. Jeffrey Stewart Timmins


Humorous epitaphs for different kinds of animals.


My mom got this one for me after seeing it at a used book store. I'm a sucker for oddly dark kid's books. While not all the epitaphs are brilliant, the ones that are make it all worthwhile.





87.

Wicked Bugs:
The Louse that Conquered Napoleon's Army & Other Diabolical Insects

by. Amy Stewart
illustrations by. Briony Morrow-Cribbs

A directory of some of the world's most deadly, dangerous, and just plain annoying bugs.


A follow-up to their book Wicked Plants and equally enjoyable.

There are some truly horrifying things sharing this planet with us...that is what I'm getting from these books.






88.

One Summer:
America, 1927

by. Bill Bryson

A look at the events that shaped the world of America during the summer of 1927.


The best non-fiction book I read this year. It is just so brilliant. If history class in school had been a fraction as fun as this book was I'd have been a history major.

I always enjoy Bill Bryson and this idea suits his style like a glove. It meanders around from event to event and back again, but everything is always connected. History has never been more enjoyable then it was in this book and I can't recommend it to you fiercely enough.

Sunday, January 5, 2014

Movie List 2013: 111-125

The continuing list of movies I've watched this year.

There's probably some swearing in here somewhere, because I really like movies. So consider yourself warned.


* = I've seen it before



*   111.   *

Talladega Nights

Reckless NASCAR driver Ricky Bobby thought he knew everything there was to know about being fast, but when a French Formula One driver defeats him, Ricky has to relearn everything he thought he knew.

Genre: Absurd race car comedy


There's a genre of absurdist comedy that I think people either love or hate. You know the ones I'm talking about: your Zoolander's and Anchorman's and their ilk. The ones with incredibly over-the-top characters and situations. It's a type of humor that's not for everyone. Personally, I'm kind of in the middle, some of them I love and laugh till my stomach hurts and a lot of them just annoy me and grate on my nerves.

This one, however, definitely makes me laugh.

For one thing it's got a great cast with main characters like Will Ferrell (Anchorman, Stranger Than Fiction), John C. Reilly (Step Brothers, Wreck-it Ralph), Sacha Baron Cohen (Borat, Da Ali G Show), Amy Adams (Enchanted, Julie & Julia), Jane Lynch (Best in Show, Glee), and more.

Part of the fun of the movie is seeing all these great actors having fun with one another and playing off each other so well.

For another thing there are so many memorable lines in this movie. As I sit here writing this they're all coming back to me and making me chuckle.

“So, what if you just said: ‘I love really thin pancakes’? That is a fair compromise, no?”

“Don't you put that evil on me, Ricky Bobby!”

“I like to picture Jesus as a figure skater. He wears like a white outfit, and He does interpretive ice dances of my life's journey.”

“Hakuna Matata, bitches!”



That's what I have to say about that.



“America is all about speed. Hot, nasty, badass speed.
-Eleanor Roosevelt, 1936”
 





*   112.   *

Kung Fu Hustle

A poor village finds itself the target of the notorious Axe Gang after two wannabe criminals accidentally instigate a feud.

Genre: Loony Tunes Kung-Fu


Oh, Kung Fu Hustle, you are delightful.

The first time I heard of Stephen Chow (the director and star of the movie) was in his earlier film Shaolin Soccer. While Shaolin Soccer is hilarious, I've gotta give it up to Chow because he outdid himself with Kung Fu Hustle.

If you're a fan of martial arts movies then you need to see this movie. Even if you're not a fan of those kinds of movies, you should still think twice before passing this one up. It's first and foremost a comedy. So while there is plenty of martial arts action, there's even more laughs. Plus the action often has this wonderful Loony Tunes quality that puts it apart from serious martial arts movies.

I mean, come on! Roger Ebert described it as: “Imagine a film in which Jackie Chan and Buster Keaton meet Quentin Tarantino and Bugs Bunny.” How could anyone not want to see a movie like that!?



“Becoming a top fighter takes time, unless you're a natural-born kung-fu genius, and they're 1 in a million.”






*   113.   *

Hot Fuzz

Police Officer Nicholas Angel is the best around. In fact, he's a little too good. In order to stop him from making everyone else look bad he's been transferred to a peaceful village. However, things might not be as serene as they seem.

Genre: Comedic Action satire


Ugh! This movie is so good. It's so good, you guys!

Whenever I'm called on to describe this movie I usually just say that it does for action movies what Shaun of the Dead did for zombie movies. If you've seen Shaun of the Dead you'll understand exactly what I'm saying, but if you haven't...well then it's a lot trickier to explain.

The Shaun of the Dead comparison is just so apt, though! They're both directed by Edgar Wright, so you can feel the similarities in the look and style of it. They both star the amazing duo of Simon Pegg & Nick Frost. They both lovingly pay homage to a genre of film while simultaneously satirizing it.

Like I said with Kung Fu Hustle—and like I say with Shaun—don't disregard these films just because you don't care for the genre they're playing with. Hot Fuzz is a comedy and it is a BRILLIANT comedy. You don't need to like guns and car chases to enjoy this movie. If you like them, then you'll be pleased to know they're definitely a part of the movie. If you don't like them, well, you'll probably like how they goof around with them, turn them on their head, and point out their inherent silliness.



“Oy! When's your birthday?”

“22nd of February.”

“What year?”

“Every year.”






114.

Hamlet
(1948)

Hamlet, Prince of Denmark, encounters the spectral ghost of his recently deceased father who he thought had died of natural causes, but this ghost is telling him that that he was murdered by his brother Claudius—Hamet's uncle (who is now King and has married Hamlet's mother)—and Hamlet should probably avenge his dad's death, but Hamlet can't just kill his Uncle, or maybe he can! Oh, jeez, this is all so confusing, maybe we'd better wax poetically for a little while until we can figure this all out.

Genre: Shakespearean tale of revenge and madness.


While I know the story of Hamlet, I had never read the play or seen any production of it. Yet, when I heard of Ryan North's plans for his book To Be or Not to Be—a choose your own adventure version of Hamlet—I figured I should take in the source material in order to better appreciate the humor of. Anyways, I tried to read Hamlet, but just like every time I try to read Shakespeare, I couldn't finish it. So I took the lazy way out and just watched the movie!

Watching Hamlet, however, proved to be its own challenge because apparently there is a freaking ton of them! I decided to go with the Laurence Olivier version, because...why not! It's Laurence Olivier!

Anyways, I liked it. If you want to watch a movie of Hamlet you should watch this one, because why not.



“Conscience doth make cowards of us all.”






*   115.   *

The Thing
(2011)

In this prequel to John Carpenter's The Thing, a group of Norwegian scientists at an Antarctic research station discover an alien vessel trapped in the ice. Even more shocking they also find an alien life form. The joy of their discovery doesn't last long, however, when it turns out the creature isn't dead

Genre: Modern remake of a horror classic.


As some of you may know, I'm a big fan of John Carpenter's The Thing. So I was pretty excited to see they were making another one. This is not to say I was in any way confident it would be good, but just that my love for the original was large enough that even a shitty reboot wouldn't couldn't hope to tarnish it. So who cares! It can do no harm! HA HA!

Considering my outlook I'm probably willing to give it more concessions than most people. While the movie does have some major faults it also does a number of things extremely well.

First off, let's talk about the faults.

The biggest problem with the movie is that there's nothing new here. It doesn't feel like a prequel at all. It feels like a modern remake of the original. With only a couple exceptions nearly all the scenes in this movie have direct parallels to the original. I mean, really, a lot of the beats of this movie are nearly identical to the original. Heck, even most of the characters feel like they were copy & pasted into the movie. You've got the gruff copter pilot, the quiet dog lover, the asshole in charge, and so on.

Also, one of the great things about Carpenter's version is that it used practical effects to such great effect. The effects might look a little old and weird by today's standards, but dammit! They're still look spooky as shit! This modern version uses CG, of course. Ugh. Sure, there's a couple of shots wherein the CG was used to great effect, but overall it just left a bad taste in my mouth. If I had never seen the old one I probably wouldn't have cared, but I did, so I do.

To their credit though, I was watching some special features for it and apparently they did go out of their way to give the effects practical elements, thus giving the CG folks something solid to work on (not to mention the actors something to act to). Which is probably why I didn't find it all to be as dreadful as I usually find CGI monsters in movies.

This all leads us to the subject of things they did well.

First of all, Mary Elizabeth Winstead. Winstead is a major reason why I tend to go to bat for this movie. Kurt Russell is not an easy act to follow, but damn if she doesn't do it. I love that the movie stars an intelligent and capable woman. Unlike the rest of this movie she doesn't try to remake anything. She brings a breath of fresh air to the film and—since she's the main character—that considerably helps a rehash like this .

However, I kind of got the feeling that a different character WAS trying to fill Kurt Russell's shoes. So the movie didn't dodge that bullet completely. It wasn't a kill shot, but it still got it in the leg and gave it a bit of a limp.

Yet I've got to give a lot of credit to these filmmakers for the Norwegians. Carpenter's movie sets up the premise that the creature first attacked a Norwegian outpost. True to form the majority of this film's actors are Norwegian! Not only that, but apparently they're some really big names in Norway. It adds a dose of realism and quality acting that is rarely seen in a  horror remake.

So there you have it. Is it perfect? No, not by a long shot. But I think it definitely has merit. If nothing else it raises some interesting juxtapositions of how the two films represent their respective time periods of Horror Films.



“Burn it!”






*   116.   *

Wimbledon

A past-his-peak tennis pro decides to call it quits and resign to taking a job as country club's tennis instructor. His upcoming appearance at Wimbledon is to serve as his last hoorah in the world of professional tennis. His look on life changes though when he meets a feisty rising-star tennis star with a lust for life.

Genre: Romantic comedy with a dash of sports.


My aunt and I are in agreement that Wimbledon is a kind of perfect movie. It's got a little bit everything you could want. There's romance, there's action, there's drama, there's humor, family, friends, life, sports, etc! It's got a little bit everything.

This is actually a favorite of mine. I really like all the characters and how they develop over the course of the story.



“I'm not an idiot, I know Lizzie likes to have her fun, keeps her relaxed, if you were just another easy... Y'know, well that would be one thing but you're not, are you?”

“As matter of fact, I was incredibly easy.”






117.

The Way Way Back

A kid is forced to go on a vacation to the beach with his mom and her asshole boyfriend. His life is a living nightmare until he finds solace in the company of a waterpark's oddball staff.

Genre: Coming of age drama with some funny bits


The theater was showing this one and how can I say no to a free Sam Rockwell movie? Plus the main character used to play young Shaun on Psych.

As far as the story goes I don't know if it really has anything to offer that you haven't seen before in every other Coming of Age drama. But look at some of the people who work at the Water Park:

Sam Rockwell (Galaxy Quest, Moon), Maya Rudolph (Away We Go, Bridesmaids), Jim Rash (the dean from Community [also half of this movie's Writer/Director duo).

I mean, I could take or leave the angsty "You're not my real dad!" scenes. But the waterpark stuff is fantastic. Plus, it's got Sam Rockwell! That's really the main reason to see this. I can't think of a time when Sam Rockwell hasn't knocked his role out of the park. He is great in this. Goofy and funny, but also realistic and flawed. The main kid is also surprisingly good. I was very pleased to see that.



“Duncan! On a scale of 1 to 10, what do you think you are?”

“...A six.”

“I think you're a 3.” 






*   118.   *

X-Men

Super powered mutants fight other super powered mutants, the government, and Discrimination!

Genre: Cheesy comic spin-off


Not gonna lie, I own this one and I watched it here as a final chance to see if it's worth keeping. I have concluded that it is not. I mean, there's some great one liners (“what do they call you? 'Wheels?'”), some great performances (need I say more than Patrick Stewart & Ian McKellen?), and a couple of really memorable scenes (the young Magneto in Nazi Germany scene for instance), but they're not enough to save the movie from its weak plot, lack of development, and its general aura of cheese.
 


“You going to tell me to stay away from your girl?”

“If I had to do that, she wouldn't be my girl.”






*   119.   *

The Great Muppet Caper

Twin brothers and wannabe reporters, Kermit and Fozzie (and their cameraman Gonzo), head to London to interview the famous fashion designer Lady Holiday. However, when they accidentally discover the identities of an elite group of jewel thieves it seems that they're the only ones who have a shot at catching them.

Genre: Brilliant Muppet comedy


For some reason most people I talk to have seen The Muppet Movie and The Muppets Take Manhattan, but haven't seen this one! What?! In my opinion The Great Muppet Caper puts those others to shame. TO SHAME, I say. The plot is much stronger, the characters are more enjoyable, the jokes are funnier, and the setting is better utilized.

In fact I'd say that in terms of Muppet movies it is second only to The Muppet Christmas Carol.



“Why are you telling me all this?”

“It's plot exposition. It has to go somewhere.”






120.

Psycho
(1960)

 After robbing her boss a woman goes on the run. While trying to elude the authorities she comes across a strange motel run by a young man with a deadly secret.

Genre:  I have no idea...Thriller, maybe?


Once again watching famous Hitchcock movies that I've never seen before. And once again it's really weird because I pretty much already know the story beforehand, or at least most of it anyway.

In case you've somehow managed to get this far in life without hearing how the movie ends, I won't ruin anything for you. I'll just say I'm not sure it'll have the impact now as it did back when it was made? I can't say for sure.

There's a lot of things I liked about this movie, but there's a lot of stuff I didn't. I really liked the main lady, but about halfway through they start concentrating on other characters who I don't really give a shit about. It all seemed very gimmicky.

The guy who played Norman Bates is really great though. He's definitely the MVP of the picture.



“It's not like my mother is a maniac or a raving thing. She just goes a little mad sometimes. We all go a little mad sometimes. Haven't you?”






121.

Strangers on a Train

Two men meet and realize that they both have someone in their lives they wish would go away...permanently. But they can't murder them! I mean, they'd be the first suspect, right? But what if...what if they switched murders? Ah, well now there's an idea.

Genre: Thriller


Another Hitchcock that I felt I should see.

There is just something about Hitchcock movies that makes me get hung up on the little things. It's maddening! So I'm just gonna get this out of the way up front. There is a scene where the cops are after a suspect and he jumps onto a crowded carousel and the cops OPEN FIRE! Into the crowd! They straight up shoot the carousel operator, quite possibly killing him, and NO ONE CARES! What!? Just....what!?

I was completely taken out of the movie with shock. What kind of terrible police officers are these? They straight up murdered some people and no one mentions it. Also why are there so many adults on this carousel? Were people really that hard up for entertainment in the 50's?

Ugh. Anyway, it's an alright movie. Like usual with Hitchcock I think it was shot very well. The premise is extremely interesting. I thought the villain was very creepy. But it is all a bit dated. It's definitely fun, but by today's standards it's far from Scary or Disturbing or whatever. If you're looking for a fun old school crime story I think you'll enjoy it.


“Don't worry, I'm not going to shoot you, Mr. Haines. It might disturb Mother.”






*   122.   *

The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo
(2009)

A disgraced journalist and an anti-social hacker team up to uncover the mystery of a girl who went missing 20 years ago.

Genre: Mystery Thriller


This is a great example of a book adaptation gone right. While I like the title they gave the American release, I do think the original title is much more telling: “Men Who Hate Women.” When you get down to it that's what the movie is really about.

Because the film revolves around men who commit unforgivable acts against women, it could have accidentally been just as exploitive as its villains. However, careful direction and the character of Lisbeth prevent that from happening. Lisbeth is just about as far from a damsel as you can get. She's fiercely intelligent, capable, and strong.

In the most chilling and graphic scene Lisbeth becomes the victim of sexual assault and rape. It's a hard scene to watch, but that's exactly what makes it so powerful. It isn't in the film for shock value or excitement. It's shown to be the horrible thing it is. It chills you, makes you uncomfortable, and it forces you to feel victimized because there's nothing you can do. But this atrocity that was committed against her doesn't break Lisbeth, she overcomes it, which leads to one of the most fulfilling bits of cinematic revenge ever made.

If you like Mysteries and/or Thrillers I think you'll really enjoy this one.



“I've never done this before. Hold still, or it'll get messy.”






123.

The World's End

A group of middle-aged men get their old group of friends back together to attempt to finish the epic bar crawl that they failed to complete in their youth. However, something isn't right about their hometown. It's become a nightmarish facsimile of its former self and seeks to do the same to them.

Genre: Sci-Fi drama about middle-aged men.


I hated this movie.

I know a lot of people will disagree with me there, but whatever. In my opinion the film is thoroughly dreadful.

And I was so excited for it! I absolutely adore Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz, and I've been eagerly anticipating this film for so long. I wanted so badly to like it and I kept telling myself, “It'll get better, just wait, it'll get better.”

But it never did.

Heck, if you listen to the commentary for Hot Fuzz you'll hear them mention they once had an idea for a film about a pub crawl that never came together, and apparently it never did. Were they just scraping the bottom of their idea barrel or something?

It was billed as the 3rd part of the Cornetto trilogy (1. Shaun of the Dead, 2. Hot Fuzz), but I have no idea why. The other two were parodying a style of movie (zombie movies and action movies respectively), and as far as I can tell this one isn't. The other two had tons of laughs, this one didn't. What's worse is that this one was straight-up boring. It plays out like a drama, not a comedy. Then there's all these stupid fight scenes and they aren't funny like the ones in the other movies were, it's like they were trying to be really cool or something?


I'll admit that the climax of the movie was brilliant, but that's it. That one scene was fantastic, the rest of the movie was boring and disappointing.



“We're more belligerent, more stubborn, and more idiotic than you could ever imagine.”






*   124.   *

Clue

A group of strangers are invited to a dinner party, but when people start dropping dead they find that it's rather hard to find a killer when everyone there has a motive for murder

Genre: Who-done-it Mystery Comedy


I love this movie. I love it so much I'm having a hard-time trying to put what I love about it into words. It's just wonderfully ridiculous and they're having so much fun with it. There's so many brilliant one liners, and wonderful characters, and so many great actors. Just take my word on it; this movie is hilarious.


“What are you afraid of, a fate worse than death?”

“No, just death, isn't that enough?”






125.

You're Next


A family meets at their cabin in the woods to celebrate their parents' anniversary. But when a strange group of animal-masked killers begin to attack, the family will have to defend itself.

Genre: Home invasion horror


In a rather odd twist, I love this movie. I was not expecting to, but there you have it.

I don't really know what to say about it, you kind of have to see it to understand what I'm talking about. It's this bizarre combination of a brilliant movie and a brilliantly terrible movie.

I mean, you've got these bits of just ridiculously stilted dialogue and these villains with ridiculous masks (that are a terrible idea! Their range of vision would be almost nil.) and it's just so silly! But then you've got one of the best female horror protagonists I've ever seen over here kicking some major ass.

It freely oscillates between frightening scenes of a nightmare scenario home invasion and Home Alone-esque hijinks (with a horror twist). There's a couple scenes that just scream Home Alone. I can't remember, but I may or may not of broken my movie silence to whisper to my companion, “This is my house. I have to defend it.”

It's got characters that are complete stereotypes and characters that are superbly fleshed out. It got kills that scare you and others that shock you because they're kind of weirdly hilarious. I mean there's this character that you're just waiting to get offed and BAM! out of nowhere he gets a crossbow bolt to the forehead and is stumbling around and you're just sitting there wide-eyed going “What IS this movie?!”

I'd freely accept if someone said this movie wasn't for them, or they thought it was terrible, but whatever! After I saw it I couldn't stop thinking about it and I wanting to see it again.

In my book that's the sign of a brilliant movie.



“Why would anyone do this?”